Ann Coulter's next column should appear online sometime tonight or tomorrow, and I'm going to paraphrase what I said in the comments of this post at Sadly, No! In the post, Brad R. asks readers to guess which righty columnist at Townhall.com
will be the first to say the "runaway bride" fiasco was caused by feminism, gay marriage, the decline of Judeo-Christian values, or some combination thereof.
I don't know if Coulter will beat the others to the punch, but I think she'll mention Jennifer Wilbanks in this week's column, and here's what I think she'll say:
She'll say that the runaway bride should now run for office as a liberal Democrat. Why? (a) Because she lied, and all liberal Democrats are liars; (b) because she rejected "traditional" marriage; and (c) because what she did led to large amounts of taxpayer money being spent.
Yuk it up, people -- these are the jokes. In right-wing circles, this stuff kills. Right-wingers think this stuff is funny. And 100% accurate.
Coulter will also say the bride's a liberal because her specific lie was that she was abducted by a Hispanic. Coulter despises Muslims and called the black teenagers who were falsely convicted of raping the Central Park jogger "animals" and "savages," yet she loves to say that only Democrats are racists:
Back when they supported segregation, [Trent] Lott and [Strom] Thurmond were Democrats. This is something the media are intentionally hiding to make it look like the Republican Party is the party of segregation and race discrimination, which it never has been....
Republicans made Southern Democrats drop the race nonsense when they entered the Republican Party. Democrats supported race discrimination, then for about three years they didn't, now they do again. They've just changed which race they think should be discriminated against....
Argh. There you have it. We'll see if I'm right.
UPDATE: Whoops -- I was wrong.